Why Borrowed Rainbow

Why Borrowed Rainbow?

I have had so many people ask me where did I get the name Borrowed Rainbow from. Well it never had anything to do with birds, it has to do with my past life.

I am a survivor of child abuse, neglect, incest, and rape. I was abandoned at birth and lived in an Orphanage until I as adopted at the age of 6. And I hated the people who adopted me, I hated strangers and anyone who came near me. I am 48 now and to this day I still do not trust anyone. I shy away from people and I choose not to have people as friends.

Now I know that I am not the only person in the world who has had bad things happen to me, but instead of blaming the reason why I still have bad things happen to me now I refuse to blame it on the past. But to use the resources in front of me to make my life better. Your life is what you make it.

You have no control nor can you change what happened in your past, but you have the control over now, and tomorrow.

I have always loved birds since childhood, but was never allowed to own one. Every book I could find on birds I would read. I never knew that people abused birds. I found a baby robin when I was 6 years old, and I wanted to care for it, feed it, and love it. But I was told to put it back where I found it. I was assured that the parents would come back and take care of it. I watched for a long time, and I never saw it's parents come back, but what I did get to watch is a stray cat walk off with it in it's mouth. I was angry at my Foster Parents and baby bird's parents for not caring. No one cared how I felt, maybe if I sat there long enough my real Parents would come back for me. But as my lifetime past me by no one came back for me. The only thing that ever made me happy was to see a Rainbow in the sky, I had to borrow that Rainbow to protect those little birds that no one else would protect. Little unwanted birds and I were related. We were not wanted by our parents, but we both need someone to care about us, and nurture us. Maybe I didn't get what I needed as a child to thrive, but here at Borrowed Rainbow, they thrive, they grow and the will always have someone who loves them. Maybe now at my age I don't need anyone to love me, that is unimportant, because I have had over 300 reason why I need to give love. Who's to say that I don't get love back? Even if it means getting a few fingers bitten, it don't anger me, but it makes me understand the reason why that bird has bitten me, there may be anger in him, if he was one of my abused birds. So everyday I work with him more, and you how what? He may never bite me again, because we have developed a trust in each other, and a special bond that won't be broken

Maybe if more people could understand their own children in that way, there would be less abuse and neglect. Broken homes are broken lives, but they can be put back together again through love and trust.

My dream was to one day to take in birds who have been neglected or abused by their owners. I was going to be their rainbow and they were going to be safe forever, never to know the feeling of abuse or neglect again.

My dreams have all come true, with more than 60% of my birds in the Aviary are protected under the Rainbow, they came from abusive and neglected backgrounds. Those that were born here are over the Rainbow. And to some that we have lost will always remain in memory in my Borrowed Heaven. If you feel that life is treating you wrong then there are places who can help you, you do not need to be a victim ever again but regard yourself as a Survivor

E-mail me Sapphyre Child Abuse, Depression, Suicide and other Hotline Numbers

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